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Bachelor Party Etiquette: Here Is All You Need To Know


09/12/2023

Your mate is getting married. All you know is that you must at least throw them a bachelor party as a good friend (and possibly as the best man). One minor issue, though: this is your first time at the rodeo. The good news is that planning your first bachelor party should not give you sleepless nights. All you need is sound planning and proper logistics. You must also avoid party planning gaffes by sticking to bachelor party etiquette.

What Is Bachelor Party Etiquette and Why Is It Important?

Bachelor party etiquette gives us a set of rules employed during bachelor party planning. These help create a map for the actual party planning. These rules also ensure that everyone is on the same page and, most importantly, that the groom has a great time. Let's dive into it.

Do's of Bachelor Party Etiquette

Here are some things to get squared away for the party.

Assign a dress code for the bachelor party

Assign an appropriate dress code once you figure out what you will do for the bachelor party. For example, you can make it a black-tie event if it's a formal dinner. However, if you are going away on a road trip and camping, cargo pants, loafers, and t-shirts will get the job done. Case in point: you don't want to be in a suit at a strip club or beach shorts for a formal sit-down dinner. When everyone knows what to wear, they come looking the part and can be fully engaged in the activities, as opposed to trying not to stand out. Similarly, even if guests are adequately dressed, it adds to the entire vibe of the party, which is precisely what you want. If you will be going on a road trip, discuss the various activities available so that everyone comes prepared. For example, if you golf, go scuba diving, or take a cruise, you want everyone to have adequate gear for these activities. To ensure this happens, include this in the bachelor plan proposal.

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Drink responsibly

Alcohol is central to a bachelor party. This has been so over the decades. However, while drinking can help people loosen up for a more fun time, it can also damper the mood of a party. For example, if everyone is too drunk, a party turns into a lethargic drinking session instead of an action-packed party. Similarly, if one or more people get too drunk and fall ill or hurt, the night ends at a hospital or on a sad note. The groom will unfortunately associate his bachelor party with these negative occurrences, which is rather unfair. Additionally, no one needs to get so drunk that the groom has to mind them on his big night. As you plan and make concessions for alcohol, politely request everyone to drink responsibly so that the night goes as planned. Also, respect the legal drinking age and have a designated driver to ensure everyone gets home safely after the party. If there is going to be anything stronger than alcohol, ensure that it's legal in the country, state or local authority you will be in. Nothing spoils a bachelor party more than getting arrested away from home.

Consider the groom's wishes and preferences

Bachelor planning etiquette insists the groom should be at the center of all planning. And naturally so. They are the ones getting married, making the party in their honor. This means bending over backwards to make the groom happy if that's what it will take. For example, if the groom is not outdoorsy, a camping trip will be an epic fail. The same goes for when the groom is very religious, and you plan a weekend of strip clubs, drinking, and gambling. The groom should also have some input with the guest list. This allows him to have people who mean the most to him and to exclude people he wouldn't want at his event. For example, if the party is at a strip club, the groom might not want his future in-laws, family members, or superiors at work to be in attendance . Allowing the groom to look over the guest list ensures the final bachelor party invitees are close to the groom, and he is comfortable around them.

When everyone follows the proper bachelor party etiquette

Create a guest list that is agreeable to all parties involved

A bachelor party should be a fun, wild time where everyone can loosen up and have a grand old time. For this to happen organically, you should have a group of people that vibe well together. So, the first step is running the guest list by the groom. After this, you also need to figure out the dynamics between the other bachelor party invitees. The final list should bring together close friends who can be themselves and mesh well during the party.

Choose an appropriate venue for the event

A venue is among the primary things to settle on early in the bachelor party planning process. Have a venue, whether you are doing a dinner, hitting the strip clubs, or taking a road trip. This means finding ideal places and calling ahead to make reservations, find out about the weather, available activities, and so on. Suppose you are going on a road trip. You must find the route and the destination and reserve enough hotel rooms. Ensure the places you sleep at have the amenities you need within easy reach. This might mean looking up nightclubs, eateries, beaches, museums, and transportation systems beforehand.

Make sure there is enough food and beverages

A party is not a party without sumptuous food and good drinks. You need to plan for this in two ways. The first is if you are having a house party. Here, you can hire caterers or order in. The entire group can chip in once you have a food and drinks budget. Exclude the groom from this because the event is for their benefit, and their only role should be to attend and enjoy themselves. The other way to go about it is if you are going on a destination bachelor party or a road trip for an entire weekend. Here, you all can agree to order different items off a menu and split the bill. Or everyone orders and pays for their meal, with one or more people picking up the groom's tab.

Keep the budget in mind when planning the event

As things start taking shape, keep an eye on the figures. Find out what everything will cost, from food to décor to plane tickets. You can begin with a rough estimate and fine-tune as the pans take shape. Once you give the plan to the guys attending the party, your proposal should include budgets. Bachelor party etiquette also dictates that you ensure whatever your party plan is affordable to everyone. You do not want people straining too much to support the groom, nor do you want people being left out because the cost is astronomical. Similarly, engage the group in an open discussion where people can freely discuss their ideas and float any cost-cutting measures that would help minimize costs. A party should feel inclusive, not one where the planner dictates and everyone else complies. Show gratitude to any hosts or sponsors who contribute to the event Bachelor parties will have one or a couple of guys doing the heavy lifting to ensure the day succeeds. It's always nice for the attendees to acknowledge the planning committee's input and hard work after or during the party. This can be through a simple vote of thanks or party favors. The same goes for those who offer their home to hold the party and those who sponsor the event. The latter includes people who cannot attend but decide to make a financial contribution to the party.

Don'ts of Bachelor Party Etiquette

With what to do in mind, let's look at what not to do. Avoid overindulging in alcohol People that take alcohol should only drink enough to loosen up without being a nuisance or a danger to themselves or others. The opposite will turn some revelers into caretakers for their overly inebriated friends, which is no one's idea of a good party. Avoid misbehaving around other guests You want to have an easy, fun mood from start to finish. This means everyone has to be on their best behavior the entire time. Anything deemed inappropriate should be left for another time, be it taking over the conversation, being inappropriately loud, any forms of aggression, and so on.

Avoid bringing up sensitive topics

Everyone at the bachelor party and other social functions should keep the conversation to neutral, pleasant, non-provocative topics. As a rule of thumb, politics and religion should be avoided. Because these subjects tend to be emotive and can thus lead to unnecessary arguments that will dampen the mood. Additionally, religion is extremely personal, and asking questions about it from people not close to you can be deemed rude and inappropriate.

What happens when you don't follow bachelor party etiquette?

Don't invite guests who are not comfortable with the planned activities

Aside from the groom being comfortable with the planned activities, ensure everyone on the invite list is also okay with them. The reason for this is simple. You want everyone to be relaxed, engaged, and fully present. This makes for a good party. If some people on the list are uncomfortable with any activities, they are unlikely to participate fully in the day's program and may even be unhappy or judgmental. This is no way to have a party. In response, the people enjoying the activities might want to pull away in solidarity with the non-participating members, or react negatively to feeling judged. The result: a boring party.

Don't neglect to factor transportation costs into the budget

Sometimes, it's easier to remember the big bills and forget minor bachelor party expenses when budgeting. This becomes problematic because you want all attendees to know the total and final costs of the party, save for anything they might want for themselves. For example, if you are going on a road trip and forget the transportation, some attendees might be caught flat-footed at the last minute. If you do not have exact figures, say if everyone is driving themselves, include a note alluding to this. You can provide the budget and let everyone know it's exclusive of transport.

Don't forget to plan for any potential mishaps or problems that could arise

While you hope everything goes seamlessly, the odd mishap or two is not uncommon for any party or event. It would help if you thought about what some of these could be to try mitigating them beforehand. This means checking weather reports, road trip routes and accessibility, alternative caterers, and so on.

Don't encourage any unwanted guests to join the festivities

While the more, the merrier, you need to keep an eye on who joins your party. This is especially true if you are having a beach party or clubbing. Allowing everyone who wants to join you to do so means you are exposing yourself to more risk.

Don't make the groom pay for anything

The groom's involvement should be restricted to picking the guest list and approving venues, especially if you are going on a road trip or another far-flung destination. The groom should not be involved in funding the budget for their bachelor party. You can include the groom's expenses in the budget so that once everyone contributes their share, the groom will be well taken care of for the entire weekend.

Planning a Bachelor Party?

If you are going to put your name on a bachelor party, it better be epic. These etiquette rules will tell you what to do and what to avoid to ensure the event is a success and that everyone, especially the groom, has a blast. Additionally, bachelor parties involve a bit of juggling. As always, start planning early so you have enough time to tweak and move things around to formulate the most memorable bachelor party ever!